Clapping hands
by ianramos22
Summary: Tyrion Lannister is at the end of his wits Bronn has left, a whore has been paid off and none have come. Cersie and Tywin have won. “Save me anyone ill give you anything!”...”Ok how about some entertainment.” Came the answer.


**...KingsLanding...**

**...Black Cells...**

**...Night before Tyrion's Execution...**

Tyrion sobbed as Bronn left it was over no one would come he was a dead man with a wail he cursed his house the gods old and new.

"IF ANYONE COULD SAVE ME I WOULD GIVE THEM ANYTHING IN MY POWER!" He cried over come with emotion.

"Could you provide entertainment?" A voice Came from the cell next over

Tyrion blinked had someone been in there this whole time?

"Yes, I would ask anyone I'm the half man the troll of Casterly Rock the defiler of whores."

"So if I kill this person I would become your best date I say it friend?!" Came the sultry voice

"Yes, yes anything all you have to do is defeat the biggest monster alive in the seven kingdoms!" Squawked Tyrion

"Done name me your champion and I'll kill the bastard for you." Purred the voice

"What's your name good sir?" Hesitantly Tyrion Asked

"Why it's Kimbley, but you can call me Crimson." The voice began to laugh and the laughter echoed throughout the black cells.

**The next morning...**

"Name your champions!" Called Tywin Lannister

"I call forth Ser Gregor Clegene!" Trilled and estatic Cersie

"I call forth Kimbley Crimson!" Tyrion Called

Ser Gregor came out a near mountain of muscle and steel he drew his sword and bellowed his challenge. On the other side a dirty, pale man who looked like he hadn't seen the sun in years was dragged in chains and dumped onto the cobblestones. The man was released from his chains and stretched. He had a beard, long unkempt black hair and a white muddy suit of some sort. The biggest thing everyone noticed is that he had no weapon.

"Is that the guy I'm supposed to kill?" Kimbley smirked

"Where's your weapon! Why don't you have a weapon!" Tyrion practically bawled "Are you trying to die?!?"

"Nah, dont need what I'm not going to use." Quipped the raven haired man

Tyrion watched with horror as the man swaggered over towards the mountain. About twenty paces away both men faced eachother. The mountain turned and bowed to the royal booth. Kimbley yawned.

"Show respect to your Queen!" Screeched Cersie

Kimbley flipped her off in response. As the crowd guffawed Tywin signaled for the match to begin.

"I'll fuck your headless corpse!" Spat Ser Gregor

Clap...BOOOOOOOOMSSSPPPPLAAAAATTTTEEERR! Everyone was silent were the mountain once stood was a red spot of goop and most of the crowd was covered in guts, blood, and awful. Kimbley cracked his knuckles then turned to Tyrion.

"Guess I gave the busybodies a bit of a washing." Chuckled Kimbley

"Warlock! Sorcery! Magic! Coward! Cheater!" Came the angry screams

"Seize that man!" Screamed Cersie

Six Lannister soldiers rushed forward with swords drawn. Kimbley simply clapped his hands again and an explosion ripped through the air in the center of the soldiers. One second they men were there the next they were gown in a flash of flames and burning air. Everyone froze afraid to even move or speak.

"Well I believe it's my win!" Stated Tyrion

He then proceeded to dissolve into fits of laughter at the look on the nobles faces.

**...KingsLanding...**

**...Blacksmith Shop...**

"Their you are milords the best armor I've ever forged." owner proudly looked over his craftsmanship

Kimbley spun around and glanced at himself in a mirror. As vain as he was even he admitted he looked good. With red greeves and bracers he looked fierce. Couple that with the gold mail skirt and the golden flame on a red chest plate made him look just dashing. Kimbley waited till Tyrion Lannister or the "little fellow," as he referred to him as, finished paying for the armor then fell into step beside him. As they walked back towards the Red Keep, Tyrion Babbled away at one thing or another, posed questions here and there which Kimbley either annswered or just ignored. People and small folk of flea bottom stared and whispers and fingers pointed at the two men. As they neared the Red Keeps archway the drawbridge they found had been drawn up.

"You are not allowed inside the keep turnback or be shot!" A Lannister soldier shout down.

"Ser Crimson If you would be so kind." Smirked Tyrion

Kimbley smirked and clapped his hands and with two explosions the chains holding up the drawbridge exploded and it came crashing down. Immediately arrows rained down on the two men. Tyrion Lannister was open mouthed as he watched the man his new mercenary stepped in front of the of the smallest Lannister and began to clapping rapidly. Explosions ripped in front as well as where the archers were. Screams and yells split the air and the two men walked across the drawbridge with a shower of blood raining down.

**Throne room...**

"Well this looks grave, the shame of your family escapes execution." Mused Tyrion as he stood in front of the throne "my wife nearly was carted off by a fool but was recovered, Littlefinger has fled to the Eryie, Dorne still wants you dead, the mountain is gone and I'm friends with the deadliest person I've ever met, does that cover everything." he finished

"You forgot best looking." Kimbley Chuckled

Tyrion shrugged "Thought they already knew that about Me."

Kimbley barked out a laugh "I'll give you this your still amusing!"

Silence fell between the two of them as the Twittering of the surrounding courtroom fluttered around them. Tywin Lannister's knuckles whitened as he balled his hands into fists.

"Now, I'm going to take my young wife and friend and we are going to leave this land you will never hear from us again."

"Oh and if you come after us I'll have Kimbley give you a standing ovation!" Tyrion Called out.

With that Tyrion Lannister, Kimbley, and Sansa Stark left the Red Keep and KingsLanding boarded a ship with hopes never to see the two Lannisters again.


End file.
